Here’s what I like: You for showing up at my blog today. If you’re from Cracked and you don’t know me, I’ve been on a self-imposed writing fast for about three weeks. If you’re my friend and you do know me, wow. Thanks for showing up day after day and getting a whole big fisftul of nothing from me. That’s true friendship.

Here’s what I don’t like: People who lie. But I make an exemption for L. Ron Hubbard, due to the fantastic amazingness of his stupendous lies. If I could lie like L. Ron, you could bet I’d have my own Kristi army by now. (They’d go by the name K.A. and wear red wigs and also do step like on those episodes of A Different World. My army is going to RAWK.)

Here’s where I should send you: To my article. At Cracked.

PS - Having finished my little book-type literary fictional novel, I’ll be returning to regular posting soon. Not yet. But soon. Thank you. Good night and good luck. Amen.