Here in Idaho Reviews Your Kid’s Daycare
By Kristi Harrison • Jun 30th, 2009 • Category: Blog, OpinionYour kid’s daycare sucks.
Your daycare’s kid-to-teacher ratio is so high that every classroom looks like Tokyo subway during the morning commute.
Your daycare’s sick child policy is so lax that the swine flu bred with the boar flu and had some baby feral piglet flus before your kid’s teachers realized anyone was sick.
Your daycare’s hiring standards are so low they hired a blind, narcoleptic, glue-sniffing turtle to watch over the toddler room.
Your daycare’s toys are in such disrepair that your baby shivved a turtle with a sharpened Monchichi arm.
Your daycare’s snacks are so unhealthy that the turtle secretly threw them up in the toddler toilet when no one was looking.
Your daycare is so filthy that no one bothered flushing the toilet covered in turtle vomit.
Your daycare’s reputation is so bad that the glue-sniffing turtle says he works at KinderCare.
I rate your kid’s daycare 3 Monchichi arms, out of a possible 17,000.
Kristi Harrison is to Dr Peppers as analogies are to Einsteins. When not coming up with awesome analogies like the one in the previous sentence, she homeschools her 3 kids. But analogy making currently takes up most of her time.
You can hear all about it if you follow her on the twitter: http://twitter.com/hereinid
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I love recurring jokes. Apparently I REALLY love turtle recurring jokes. Is the whole place staffed by turtles or just one huge incompetent turtle?
And, my day care is cheap! YAY for parenting by the checkbook!
HEY. I will have you know that the meth-heads who run our local daycare KILLED THE TURTLE WITH A BROOM.